Pieces of my heart

“Fear and Love can never be experienced at the same time. It is always our choice as to which of these emotions we want. By choosing Love more consistently than Fear, we can change the nature and quality of our relationships.” - Gerald G. Jampolsky I’ve been giving away pieces of my heart last week,…

Searching for meaning

‘Meaning makes a great many things endurable – perhaps everything.’ ~ Carl Jung After Luna died, on one of my visits to her at the funeral home, I wrote her a letter. In this letter I said many things but one of those things was a promise to make sure her short life counts for…

The language of baby loss

I recently wrote a guest blog post for The Legacy of Leo blog, run by Jess, one of Leo's mummies. The post is a part of her Diversity In Loss series during this Baby and Infant Loss Awareness Month - with this week being of particular importance. I wrote about Luna, but specifically about the…

Courageously Broken

Ahem, soooo, I have gotten two or three comments recently telling me how 'strong' I am or must be. These have come via social media channels, but I have had it said to my face over the years as well, and it's got me thinking. I want to be very clear, I am enormously grateful…

Pregnancy loss and mental health

The pregnancy loss that tipped me over the edge was a medical termination. We lost Luna at 19 weeks, she had Turner’s Syndrome, we knew this from 12 weeks. We had been giving her time to see if the complications she was suffering from may stabilise to a point where she could be born live…

Remembering Luna: A funeral for a baby

After last week's article, I really wanted to look at my memories of Luna more closely. I have already written about what happened to her in the article titled T.O.P but I wanted to write about her funeral. The anniversary for this is approaching and it's been on my mind a lot lately. All that we…

T.O.P

That's what I saw typed on my notes as I was sat across from the Registrar. She was talking to me about my latest missed miscarriage, what my options were, what they could do for me, etc... T.O.P. It took me a moment to figure out what this meant, and then I realised: Termination of…

To Luna

I wonder what you would be doing right now. If you had been healthy and been able to make it to full term, you would be about 18 months old now. Would you have been like your big brother, late to get up and walk, or would you have been keen to keep up with…

Reflections

Taking a look at the photo gallery I posted on New Year's Eve, I realised how many of the photo's have Luna as their subject. This is really heartening to see, she is a part of our family and we are thinking of her always. Which means we are taking her with us everywhere and…